Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Nuclear Business Opportunity

Yesterday was the 25th Anniversary of the Chernobyl disaster.

Russia, which owned the plant, marked the event by calling for "Stricter Nuclear Safety Rules".

Ukraine, which actually ended up holding the Chernobyl baby, said it still needs to mobilise $300 million to bury the mess.

Belarus, Russia & Ukraine, which together hosted most of the 600,000 people exposed to high levels of radiation, have, in recent years, significantly reduced the benefits they were paying the sufferers. Belarus banned a traditional annual protest march in Minsk and relegated a planned evening rally to the outskirts.

The European Union, announced a relief package of $156 million.

The United States, till yesterday stuck between Obama's birth and Osama's life, did not make a big ado about the anniversary.

Japan, as always, politely asked to be excused. 

The United Nations: Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon, after a recent visit to to Chernobyl, came out with recommendations for the future. These mainly revolve around the flexi-words: review, study, tighten, analyse and the like. He also informs us that, 25 years on, a fresh safety shield is in the process of being installed around the blown reactor. Better late than never.

India, which was a Gandhian bystander and saw nothing, heard nothing and said nothing when it happened, marked the silver anniversary by declaring its commitment to accelerated development of new nuclear power capacity.

At a high level meeting the Prime Minister gave the go ahead for the Jaitapur nuclear power project in the western state of Maharashtra. (Not very far from Koyna Nagar, the site of a major earthquake in 1967). When ready, it will be the largest nuclear power complex anywhere in the world.

Per the official fact sheet, it is the best thing that ever happened.

India Takes Precautions
The high level committee which gave the go-ahead to the Jaitapur plant, was briefed by The Secretary, Department of Atomic Energy, a leading bureaucrat, whose minions planned the project; and by the CEO of the Nuclear Power Corporation of India, a leading technocrat of the Government of India, who will implement the project.

The Prime Minister announced that
  1. a super regulatory authority will be formed to regulate nuclear disasters,
  2. the protesting residents of Jaitapur have been told that they are totally safe, and
  3. in any case, a generous compensation package is being formulated. Just in case.
Left unstated was the obvious fact that there was no need to hear any dissenting voices or anyone who might actually know something about nuclear safety.

Classified Information
While it is well known that India is quickly tying up massive uranium supplies dirt cheap from Ukraine to feed its rising nuclear appetite, it is also learnt from highly reliable sources that:
  1. India is setting up a Nuclear Safety Consulting Corporation and a Nuclear Disaster Management Corporation, both to be chaired by Suresh Kalmadi,  who has been whisked off to Tihar jail in Delhi. Ensconced in the famous jail, away from prying media, Mr. Kalmadi, along with his co-chair, A Raja, the former Telecom Minister, assisted by top managers of various Indian companies already lodged there, will work out business plans for the two new ventures.
  2. The Human Resources ministry is working with various countries across the globe to determine their requirements of radio-active human beings. The radio-active body shopping business alone is expected to take India to the ranks of G5. Far out-shining the software body-shops we have set up over the last three decades.
For the first time this ancient civilisation has managed to get into a win-win situation.
  • If our plants are indeed safer than safe, the Safety Consulting Corporation will rake it in.
  • If, on the other hand,  they are not, we will have a head start on Disaster Management. Apart from expert advice, every country will need people willing to go in to disaster sites for damage control. What better than ready-made radio-active people? Of which we will have millions!

Friday, April 22, 2011

The Nuclear Murders

P. G. (Plum) Wodehouse, the eminent English historian and biographer recorded for posterity, among other things, the accidental wit and wisdom of Bertie Wooster. One immortal gem goes:  
One man's You-Know-What is another man's Whatchamacallit.

The nuclear disaster unfolding  dramatically in hapless Japan has shaken everyone but evoked very different responses from countries in the nuclear power club.

First off the block was Germany, which withdrew the "carry-on" permission it had given in the recent past to seven of its nuclear plants past their planned age. Work on new plants was stopped pending a rigorous review of safety issues.

France which has the largest installed nuclear power base in the world and is reputed to have the safest of designs has not shown any signs of slowing down, but also has nothing new coming up.

The United States does not have anything significant under construction or development. There is no possibility that they will be rushing into anything fresh under the circumstances.

Most OECD countries are expected to embark on major 'review and rectify' programmes for existing plants and slow down whatever new plans they have in the works; at least until significant progress is made in resolving previously known issues as also new ones now thrown up by Fukushima.

Outside the OECD we have China and India. Given its stated goal to get away from coal and oil, China has major nuclear facilities under planning and development. In absence of any pronouncements, not much is known about what China does and less about what China thinks.

India on the other hand has already come up trumps.

The Indian nuclear establishment has declared with one voice that 'our plants' are safe. Some have even used the word 'safer'.

The planning commission has declared that we need to increase the share of nuclear power in our energy plans.

The environment minister has done a typical flip-flop. One day he proclaimed that there is a need for a fresh look at all our plans. Specifically, he said, the Jaitapur facility, which will be the largest anywhere in the world, should be rescaled.

The very next day, he announced that there is no real need for any change. Our technology is superior. Our scientists will make sure that we are at no risk.

The Prime Minister has made some vague remarks about reviewing safety systems and gone on to sign a fresh deal with Ukraine to buy mega quantities of Uranium.

In Maharshtra, where there has been stiff resistance to the Jaitapur complex, we have started killing protesters.

Next Nuclear Business Opportunity